A celebration of Gwyneth Paltrow

Team Goop is victorious!

In what will undoubtedly go down as the most pressing legal story of the week, Gwyneth Paltrow’s ski crash trial ended with the movie star prevailing over retired optometrist Terry Sanderson.

The Wall Street Journal reported that the seventy-six-year-old doctor “sued Ms. Paltrow in 2019, alleging she rammed into him while they were both skiing at Deer Valley Resort in Park City, Utah.” From brain scans to Sanderson’s daughter’s testimony, none of the “evidence” seemed to help his case.

But the biggest clue that Paltrow was in the right was the fact that she would fight the case at all.

In 2021, the optometrist sued the actress-turned-wellness-guru for $3.1 million. A judge dismissed that complaint, so Sanderson refiled — this time seeking $300,000 in damages. Plenty of megastars would have just paid the 300k and moved on — especially if, deep down, they knew they were at fault. Instead Paltrow countersued for $1, sending a clear message that this case wasn’t about money.

After her victory yesterday, she released a statement that read, “I felt that acquiescing to a false claim compromised my integrity.” In other words, this case for Gwyneth was about principle. Even principle comes with a price, though.

Plenty of viral moments from the trial reinforced the out-of-touch elitist image that has followed Paltrow since the early Nineties. In court, when asked about any losses she had suffered due to the crash, the fifty-year-old replied, “Well, we lost half a day of skiing.” She was roundly mocked on social media for what many saw as a callous, Marie Antoinette-esque response.

In what might go down as the most Gwyneth headline of all time, the Daily Mail wrote, “Judge in Gwyneth Paltrow’s ski-slope crash trial bans her team from bringing in ‘TREATS’ for court bailiffs as she prepares to testify TODAY.”

If I were a bailiff, I’d be peeved. Who knows what Goop-ified treat she had in mind. A piece of a meteorite perhaps? A custom plant music installation?

The photo that accompanied the article featured Paltrow in a gray outfit holding a water bottle and notebook. That is what a layperson might see at least. GQ was able to add a bit more color to the look: “She entered the courtroom in a slate-gray double-breasted Brunello Cucinelli suit over a soft gray tank top with layered gold necklaces, carrying a ‘GP’-monogrammed lambskin-covered Smythson notebook ($325) and a glass liter bottle of Mountain Valley Spring Water ($24 for a 12-pack).”

Before you roll your eyes (it might be too late), consider this: most people in GP’s position would have gone to great lengths to appear “regular” in front of a jury. It wouldn’t have been hard for the actress to stop off at the GAP and grab a few t-shirts and a pair of khakis. Surely she could have left her fancy notebook at home and brought a legal pad.

But the star seemed unfazed at the prospect of losing in the court of public opinion — and was more focused on winning in actual court.

And that, my friends, is part of her charm. In a world full of celebrities itching to be seen as relatable, Gwyneth has instead created an empire off of being herself.

Now, “herself” might not be everyone’s cup of green tea, but she seems OK with that.

Paltrow is an unapologetically upper-class nepo-baby movie star who likes expensive cashmere and wacky wellness trends. She once told a British TV host that she would “rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a can.” This level of authenticity comes with its fair share of mockery, sure, but it clearly has its benefits: Gwyneth is an undeniable powerhouse and pioneer in the wellness space that she helped create.

Success aside, there is something admirable about a person who, despite decades of teasing and critiques, hasn’t changed one bit to appease her detractors. The quest to be liked is an all-consuming and losing game. Other stars might learn something from the woman who has refused to play it.

There is a wonderful scene in Breakfast at Tiffany’s where Holly Golightly’s agent asks her new neighbor Paul if he thinks the young beauty is a “phony.” Paul replies that he doesn’t know; then he adds that he doesn’t think so. The agent informs him, “You’re wrong. She is a phony. But on the other hand you’re right. She isn’t a phony because she’s a real phony. She believes all this crap she believes. You can’t talk her out of it.”

Love her or hate her, there is no denying that Gwyneth Paltrow is as real a phony as they come.